Tuesday, December 1, 2009

Oh, don't tell me you really did that?

Today's been okay. I had about 70 cals at school lunch of peaches, didn't snack the whole day. Then I got home and immediately went to the fridge, a bad habit that has stayed with me from when I used to eat "normaly". I pulled out an open yogurt and ate about 50 cals of it. I felt a total binge coming on, so I walked out of the kitchen, but I walked right back in. I decided that I might as well give myself something low-cal just to shut up the fat girl in my mind. I had a 100 cal granola bar. 220 cals, and it's not even six o'clock yet. I'm going to eat half a 100 cal yogurt or less for dinner-that is, if any parents are home. If we're on our own for dinner, nothing. Also, I'm going on a walk with my friend, we'll be out for a while. Hopefully that will do some helpful damage.

More later.
So, my friend bailed on the walk and we went to her house and ate. Ate as in a tiny slice of cake, a bunch of wheat thin crackers, a bunch of candy corn, and an apple. Go ahead and hate me now. I hate myself, too.

Her scale read 111.6 when I left. No more food for this fatty. I may not have gained much this time, but if there's a next time...well, you know. So, new goals:

Wednesday: 250
Thursday: 250
Friday: 200
Saturday: 200
Sunday: 170

My guess for today's calorie count is in the 5-700s, I have no idea, to be honest. I don't want to know, either. But that cake ruined me for sure. So disappointing, I'd been doing amazing up until this point. Tomorrow will be a better day. I'm going to go under my goal of 250 cals.

Hugs & Butterfly Kisses

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